“I learned not to trust anybody because that is how rumors are started,” Iqbal said. I know I can trust him more than anyone.” Other teens struggle to advise friends tangled up in this same way between faith and love.“People I thought were close to me made up things and it got around. I realized that not everybody can be nice and I had to accept what was happening.” Iqbal considers herself “more aware” in her current relationship, which her parents know about. High school junior, Adnan Shoukfeh, 16, of the International Academy in Oakland County, Mich., said some of his male friends are in casual romantic relationships.They are young and in love, she said, and not worrying about blending in to conceal their Muslim identity. “Growing up like that, you learn to keep your personal life a complete secret,” she said.
They admire American culture and cannot escape the societal pressure to date early.However, they are fully aware of the risks of getting found out.Punishment, he said, can vary from spending compulsory time at the mosque to getting switch to a different school.Ibrahim Mossallam, director of the Muslim American Youth Center in Brooklyn, N. If you’re not a talker, think up a list of possible topics -- TV shows, music, school -- before the date, Piorkowski says. “With texting and email, all you get is words,” Piorkowski says.
If you’re chatty by nature, be sure to give her a chance to speak.However, since school hours are the only setting for the relationships, Shoukfeh doubts his friends are doing much sexual experimentation.Shoukfeh’s friends aren’t robots, however, and they occasionally leak details to him about their relationships. Shoukfeh said his friends struggle to reconcile their religious beliefs and their actions. This goes beyond the (hopefully) obvious steps of bathing and using deodorant, which are important. That way you at least get a clue from the tone of her voice. But there are things you can do to make it easier -- for both of you. Also, think twice before texting or emailing her after the date, tempting as it may be. Worst case, if you can’t see her face to face, just call.“That way you’re letting her know how you feel and also considering her,” says Geraldine K. If she doesn’t like your suggestion, throw out a different one. “Use basic manners: If it’s cold out, give her your jacket.” If you're feeling nervous, don't sweat it. But be careful not to put too much pressure on her or the relationship. “On these romantic comedies, love is all about infatuation and feelings,” Kalish says. It’s about caring and growing.” You need to give her and yourself room to grow as individuals, Piorkowski says. Spend time with her, but also spend time with your guy friends. “They tend to lash out.” It’s OK to go home and cry. (Kalish says her research shows that 90% of the time, the parents cause the breakup.) Besides, if you really like her, you don’t want to ruin the chances that you might get back together someday.