So chill out, other people have a right to their views too. What he was referring to was when someone goes OUT OF THEIR WAY to put that phrase, ‘my kids come first’, in a profile or write it during a conversation (how does that even come up in conversation???
) there are HUGE issues there and the person reading it should run for dear life. So there was no need for you to “counter” with “why I would put my child over a man” because he wasn’t arguing that point - you veered off into a completely different direction with your rant.
Neuharth also notes that while it’s common for men to want to date women younger than themselves, if there's too much of an age gap, it's a sign he’s probably not looking for an equal partner in the relationship. One had to be held back by other members of his family when he tried to assault me. All I heard was “Queenie” this, and “Queenie” that. From a mother’s perspective, let me give you a reason why I would put my child over a man.
If the person is single, what else would they put in their photos, but their dog, etc? So, I don’t even read profiles that say, “..children will always come first.” I think kids are really cool, but I don’t need to be in a relationship where I will always com second. This is by far not the only one, but it is the easiest to explain.
Christan Marashio, founder of And Thats Why Youre Single.com, adds that “it's normal for people to have some trouble crafting a profile and to use self-deprecating humor to lighten the mood.
Too much humor is usually a sign that the person is insecure and uncomfortable with being vulnerable, which could lead to problems with emotional intimacy down the road.
But Vondie Lozano, licensed marriage and family therapist, has some other not-so-obvious flags to add to the list.
Self-description: If the user name or headline is weird, overtly sexual or otherwise inappropriate — Bangyourdaddy, 69Reasons — you can stop there, says Trish Mc Dermott, a founding team member of
Only narcissists who use their kids as a get out of jail free card for why others should put up with their lack of effort, and to promote their image of themselves as all-giving angels do that. Mothers NEED to be alert re: the man who may be a secret pedophile. My advice is that single moms should not date until their children are grown, but I realize not every feels they can do that.
So in that case, one still needs to be very, very carefully and vet that guy BEFORE he even gets to meet the kids!
Also avoid people that disclose too much, whether it’s a recent staph infection, bankruptcy or bad breakup.
And Mc Dermott recommends steering clear of people who don’t have kids but use undue space in their profile soliciting information about the age and sex of your children.
So improve your chance of success by keeping an eye out for the following red flags as you sort through potential date’s profiles: Photos: Photos can tell you a lot about a potential date.